Y Wednesday, June 20, 2007
the happenings.
today was the ultimate boredom. there's nothing to do. hols are over. yet i dun wan it to end. however its getting boring-er each day. gosh. this is stupiid. go online at 8am. go offline at 7pm. pathetic life la. whatever lo.
went online to msn today. saw lijun online. she's lost. lols. okayy, but sadly i cant tell u guys the problem. its a secret. right.. thn i saw my angel. i dunno why, but speaking to her online becomes a split personality. its something like putting on a false front and chat. feels stupiid, am stupiid, and i'm stupiid. maybe i just feel awkward talking to her. ever since so much things happen in this hols, things doesnt fall in place either way.
my fren spoke to me and asked me how many girls have i flirt with. i was like, u son-of-a-b****, the only person i'll flirt with is yr sis and yr mum. sounds kinda cruel. yea. think i lost my cool there. flirt? nah, i didn flirt okayy. i was rather DUMPED.. thats a freaking big difference. besides, which person in the right frame of mind would ever like me? and trust me when i say that, its a PROVEN fact. so quit arguing with me on that issue.
sms-ed her ytd. she misplaced her phone with her 'fren'. so much for fren la. but, he contacted me to ask me how he could contact her or if i could help. natural instincts was, what in the world is her phone doing with u. but who cares. its with him anyway. than so randomly, he asked me what she liked most. that is a stupiid catch phrase on showing how much interest he have in her. i followed up by asking him if he has a interest in her. guys cant lie. serious. he bullshit around, but end up admitting to it. sighs. thn he said i was his love rival becos i told him i liked her too. now that was crappy. who the hell wants him to be a love rival? i dun even consider him that. more like a fren to me. but anything la. whatever lo.
told her abt it. first reaction from her was, his always crappy around. dun take him seriously. i'm kinda guessing that u like him as well and am rejoicing in yr own heart. but whatever la. its you. he mention u treat him as a brother only. well, things will change when time takes over. sighs. once again. a book proven nonetheless. i just dunno wad to do.
god obviously has not come back with a reply. i'm not expecting him to come down personally and tell me the answer. if that happens, its Ragnarök le. haha. the end of the world. but still, i feel raw. i rmbr the promise each time i lay in bed. reminiscing the past and contemplating the future. honestly, the future looks bleak. somehow, everything i ever did backfired. and i'm in the wrong once again. maybe if the world's hatred was targeted at me, it would end my life faster. the faster route to less pain. cool guys..
joan and vanessa are back from Australia. haha. that so cool.. she was saying something abt leeuwin means lion in 'aus MT language'. haha. than she mention that aus ppl love to say things like, 'check it out' , 'what's up dude' , 'that's so cool' , 'yeah man' and the best one was, they love to use 'where the bloody hell are you'. lols. tell that to a SG person and u're in for shit. lols. but its a norm for them. sighs. maybe i'll go Australia someday.
till than guys.
pain was nvr ending. it cuts deeper each day. ='(
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